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In My Next Life.....

(Another repost from a repost.  This one from as far back as 2010.)

(This post was originally published on Skirt!.com as "Plans for My Future". I was very proud of it for the way it made me feel while writing it and for the comments I got both on and off the page. It was inspired by a feeling of being kicked around.....by my son's autism, by the school system, by my job, by old friends, by life in general. I think every time I read it I am going to take back a little of that power that got leaked from me. I hope you will too.)

In my next life, I’m gonna be Elaine Benes. I’ll have great hair and cute saddle shoes and won’t take shit off anyone. I’ll be an awful dancer, but I won’t know it. I’ll turn gay guys straight, lose keys, lose jobs and still manage to expense down comforters and Water Piks to my company account……
In my next life, I’m gonna be Mother Theresa. First, I’ll start of as Sister Theresa. I’ll buy enough cloth to have three sets of clothes and I’ll share my lunch with peasant children. I’ll feed. I’ll nurse. I’ll teach. I’ll soothe. I will say overwhelming things that no one will think much of at the time but will be printed on embossed cards and later sold for a price that would have fed me for a week…….
In my next life, I’m gonna be Hillary Clinton. I will have all the things Gloria told me I couldn’t. I’ll take a sideline title job and turn it into a motorized platform. I’ll make coming in second look so much like winning that second will have to be called something else. I’ll hold my head up and be an example even when I want to crawl under the covers. I’ll set the stage for those to come after me…….
In my next life, I’m gonna be Lita Ford. I’ll learn how to play like Ritchie Blackmore and then I’ll spit in the faces of the jack-offs ogling me while I shred. I’ll grind and slither on the floor because I CAN. And then I’ll kick ass with my pick because I CAN……..
In my next life, I’m gonna be Nikki Giovanni. I’ll change my name and move from South to North. I’ll write, I’ll speak, I’ll shock. I will lay down in print the things other girls won’t say out loud that other girls will read later and make them want to be like me. I’ll have the guts to write the stuff you WISH the teachers had made you read in school……
In my next life, I’m gonna be That Girl. Not Marlo Thomas. The Other Girl. The Girl who always has perfect hair. The Girl who always knows but stays quiet. The Girl who isn’t just smart but is clever. The Girl who stands up. The Girl who stands back. The Girl who doesn’t wish but becomes. The Girl who thinks and does.
You know……That Girl.

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